Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Je suis...?

I've suddenly had random urges to write my titles in french, in seems...

I read other people's blogs, and sometimes I wish I could be as incoherent, random, and as figurative as they are. My blogs seem so literal compared to them. and theirs seem so deep.

Oh well. Maybe I'm just not as deep as I like to pretend I am.

I had these really odd dreams last night.

The first one was kinda really scary. I think it was Halloween, and somebody was planning a trick or treating party. I can't remember who it was. But one person who was invited was this young boy who was a murderer. He killed people with a knife, and somehow that related to music, because I remember discussing with somebody how he only killed people in the key of Ab. Then he started talking with us, and he confirmed that fact. I saw this old woman off to the side, and the kid suddenly started staring at her, and creeping up behind her. I knew what was going to happen, but I couldn't do anything. He jumped on her from behind and started slashing her neck and face. Without even looking at the other people who were there (one of them was Haley, I don't know who the other was), I turned and started running, while calling my parents on my cell phone. Over the phone, I blabbed something about how somebody was dead, and I wanted to go home.

This is all taking place in my grandparents field, oddly enough. Anyways, I run back to the house, and my mom/dad is there (it wasn't clear which one it was). They're talking to some other parent who's there, and they seem reluctant to drive. So I get in the drivers seat, all ready to go, but they still want to stay and chat. At that moment I broke down, and I couldn't understand how nobody else seemed to get the fact that I had just seen somebody be killed, and I really wanted to go home.

So that was that dream. The next one doesn't have quite as much detail, but it was very happy.

It had to do with university, although I don't know if I was in university or not at that point. But I was hanging out with all university people. There was this top university student guy who was, like, the cool guy who everybody liked, and admired, and followed and whatnot. I don't quite know how, but somehow I took over his spot as top university person, and I remember wondering if this was the first time a first year had ever taken this spot...so I supposed maybe I was in university. So after I got this spot, everybody wanted to give me flowers and get my autograph and such on. And I got the top resident spot and everything, where I could watch over all the other people and make sure they're okay and everything.

And that was all there was to that dream. It sounds really odd, but there wasn't a single negative feeling in the entire thing, which was very refreshing after the first one.

Questions of the day:
Have you ever looking in the mirror and actually believed that you really are beautiful?
Have you ever thought, even after meeting everybody you've ever met in the world, that you're still the weirdest person there is?
Have you ever done most of your thinking/daydreaming while staring at yourself in the mirror?
Have you ever been genuinely happy that you are who you are?


"Socially unept? Your english teacher would be proud of you."

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