Monday, September 08, 2008

Caught in the middle

Do you ever have those moments where you suddenly look at yourself and think...you know, I must be really annoying.

Yeah, kinda feeling that way.

And yet not. It's an odd feeling.

You know what I'm in the mood for? A heart to heart talk. Unfortunately, as I need sleep, that won't be happening anytime soon. I think I need to hold on to this feeling until an appropriate moment comes alone. Will I take that moment? That remains to be seen. I sometimes let them go by.

Why you may ask? Well, ask the part of my brain that's supposed to help me form words and tell me what to say. I can tell you, you probably won't get an answer, because that part of my brain seems to be somewhat dysfunctional.

Which is ironic, because at the same time I think I had incredible word vomit tonight. I don't think it was very pretty.

Okay, seriously, the urge for a heart to heart talk is growing, so I have to change the subject.

On another note, I think my iPod may have officially died. It looks like it's refusing to charge, which I don't believe is a good sign. I'm going to leave it for a while and if nothing happens...well damn.

Why does it seem like just when I finally figure out mostly who I am and I'm comfortable with myself and my life, both of those things seem to change?

And yet, it's also weird how I know how much both myself and my life are changing...but I'm strangely comfortable with it.

Nevertheless, it's still a good feeling.

Dear life,

I have the insane urge to have a heart to heart talk. If you could somehow give me a change to act on that urge sometime in the near future...like, say, tomorrow afternoon for example...I would be very grateful.

Love,

~Calminaiel~

"It doesn't matter how useless your part is...it's important."

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