Tuesday, February 19, 2008

What can I say?

'Tis the question of the night, it seems.

I'm so thankful for physics homework. I won't lie. Spending the whole first semester doing social and french homework, I forgot what it was like to just sit down and get homework done. Social and french homework...and english too, really...just gets me depressed, and then I can't think, and I'm always wondering if what I'm saying is right, or if it's making sense, etc. But with physics, everything is just so straightforward, I can just sit down, look at it, and it's done within the hour. I love it. I love physics.

And I love figuring out problems, especially all on my own. Well, I shouldn't say that. I was working it out with Randall. But still. Going from having absolutely no clue what to do, to finding exactly the right answer is a pretty good feeling. I enjoyed it.

I also enjoyed the feeling of talking about physics on the phone, and the majority of the family in the house probably not really having a clue what I was talking about. I won't lie, it was an amusing thought.

I'm also not in the best mood tonight. It's mostly because of my dad. Well, actually it's completely because of my dad.

Not that I'll blame him entirely, I guess. I know it's me too. It's my stupid angsty teenager side, with all its hormones, that acts up and gets irritated and annoyed at anything anybody says to me. At least, that's what I'm sticking with. I'm coming up on 18, and at that point, I'll have two more years to blame my bad moods on angsty teenager behavior. So I intend to get the most out of it that I can.

Anyways, my dad's bugging me about being up late again. I'm going to get all my insane rantings out first, and then I'll move on and rationalize.

It just bothers me so much when he mentions how late I'm up. As before stated, I'm coming up on 18, and I really don't want to be told to go to bed early. This is one reason why I'm disappointed that I'm not going away for university, or moving into res or something. At least then I'd be able to do what I want.

Then he goes on about how he can't sleep because I'm up and stuff. Okay, I never actually make that much noise. It's not my fault that he can't sleep if somebody so much as breathes too loudly. It's not like I crash my way around the house, I'm reasonably quiet. Besides, other things have happened at night, and I'll say 'sorry if I woke you' and he'll be all like, 'no, I never even noticed.'

Example: last year's lunar eclipse. For a couple of hours at least I was walking in and out of the house, using the front door and back, checking on the moon, and coming back to chat with Kelskie and Corey. The next morning he said he never heard a thing. Now, if he can sleep through me walking in and out of the house all night, why can't he sleep through me creeping from the living room to my room?

Alright. Reasoning time. I'll admit that sometimes I get a bit careless when attempting to be quiet. Yeah, I start to type faster, and my typing's not exactly whisper quiet. I'm sure there are other examples where I'm not exactly as quiet as I could be, but I can't think of them.

I'd say that he could bring it up in a different way. Like, instead of bugging me about how late I was up, just mention that I was a little too loud when I was up or something. But I'm really lying, because I know it would annoy me no matter how he brought it up. Which kinda sucks, because I hate when this becomes an issue. I'm not saying that he should just live with the fact that I'm a night person, because it's not like I expect him to sleep through whatever racket I may make. But still, I don't want to have to be told to go to bed for the next couple years all through university.

Sigh. Okay, enough of that I suppose. It's really just the same rant I have every time this issue comes up, I just usually never let it out because it usually blows over. For a month or two.

Oh, and I will take the blame on bugging him about Rascall Flatts tickets. I know I was kinda wanting to know everything all at once, and he didn't really have anything significant to tell me. I was being kinda stupid with him and bothersome and such. It just seems like I've been putting my entire life together at the last minute all the time lately, and I guess it just seemed like here was an opportunity to get something done ahead of time so I wouldn't have to worry about it.

There are many other thoughts going around lately, but those are for another time, if I even decide to share them at all. Congrats if you read this far. I know my posts tend to be quite long.

Goodnight I suppose.

~Calminaiel~

"It's festival season. Of course the band directors are squirrelly."

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